My Family Is Moving to Arizona!
My family is moving to Arizona in a few days. We had planned to go for months. And then we couldn’t go. Now, suddenly we are packing our bags. I’ve been suffering from migraine headaches and what I assume are near panic attacks due to all of the stress of preparing for the move and my worries over whether we’re making the right choice. But I’m glad we’re going. I’m ready for a change and a new adventure. If you’re wondering, “Should I move to Arizona?” Then this story might help you decide if life in Arizona is right for you.
Over 14 years ago I moved to San Diego with my then-fiancé and now husband of many years. We had start-up company dreams and beach wishes. With me entering business school full-time, his lower wage, and the difference in cost of living, we took a 70 percent cut in pay to plow our way out of the snow of Minnesota and into the shores of Southern California.
We’ve clung to the California dream for years. We almost moved away once before, to Silicon Valley or back to Minnesota, whichever job made the offer first. Then my husband’s miracle job swooped in to save us. I couldn’t picture starting my family outside shore-lined San Diego. I had envisioned a beach baby who would giggle at the delight of the ocean at her toes. A few years later, I got her. And then I got my little sand digger boy three years after that.
But here’s the thing. We rarely go to the ocean. Ocean waves in San Diego are too big. The water is too cold. Eventually, the dream job became a nightmare when the economy crashed into a frothy mess. My husband works in the mortgage industry. They’re the first to feel the pain and the last to see relief.
Last year when my family began considering a move, we talked about Portland, Costa Rica, Minnesota, and, yes, Arizona. I lived in the Phoenix area from age 8 to 22, besides one year in Montpellier, France during college.
I swore I’d never go back to hands burnt on a blazing steering wheel and blow drier air blasting from open summer car windows. One day I marched into my husband’s home office and announced, “I can’t live in Arizona. We have to take it off the table.”
But then things changed with his job. We were doing well, making good money, actually SAVING money for the first time in years. Then his company switched sails. They priced themselves out of the market on purpose, afraid of upcoming financial changes.
Suddenly we were bobbing in the sea without a motor. We needed to swim to shore…somewhere where housing is more affordable. Somewhere we could breathe again without swallowing salt water.
Again, I marched, “We need to move to Arizona. It’s the only thing that makes sense.” And it did. My husband could keep his sales territory and commission. We would have more money to spend and save. My parents live in Arizona. So do my brother and his two kids. The Mexican food in Arizona is as good as what you’ll find in Mexico if you ask me. Plus, there’s so much more to do in Phoenix now than when I was growing up. Besides, we’d have a backyard swimming pool. We decided to dive in.
We put our dream house up for sale. For months we prepared our children to leave the only home they’d ever known. Then we hit a reef — no more Arizona. We needed to stay put due to a job change for my husband. With Travel Mamas, I can live anywhere. Him? Not so much. Suddenly, we wanted Arizona ever so much.
For months we searched for an affordable rental home that met our expectations in San Diego, with no luck. And then…a break in the waves. My husband’s new company said we were free to venture to sunnier and more cactus-filled pastures. This was just a couple of weeks ago.
Still, I can’t help but feel it’s not the desert for which we are destined. It’s like we were stuck in the dream of San Diego and Scottsdale is our first step to getting unstuck. Today I told my husband that I see Arizona as a stepping stone and that I cannot picture living the rest of my life in the desert.
I was surprised when he said, “Me neither. I can’t believe I’m moving to Arizona. But it makes sense. We want to live near family. It’s more affordable. This is what we’re doing.”
I asked our two kids, “If it were up to you, and it isn’t, would you rather stay in San Diego or move to Arizona?”
They both answered right away, “Arizona!”
I was shocked. “Why?” I asked.
“Family!” they said.
So off we go to Arizona.
When I close my eyes, I envision rain, green, wet, and trees. That’s where I think I belong. But off we go to the desert.
Off we go on a new, drier adventure. I look forward to sharing our journey with you…cactus thorns, swimming pools, and all!
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An Update: Where Are We Now?
Want to know more about our move to Arizona and how we settled in? Take a look at this story about adjusting to life in Arizona!
Learn More About Life in Arizona
Discover the best things to do in our hometown of Scottsdale with kids.
For cooler weather and small-town vibes, take a look at this array of things to do in Prescott.
Explore Northern Arizona’s biggest city with this guide to Flagstaff.
Read about Arizona’s #1 tourist attraction with these tips for visiting the Grand Canyon.
Are you considering moving to Arizona, too? Share your thoughts and questions in the comments below!
I’m so happy to have found travelmamas.com. We are in almost the same boat as you were when you wrote this post. My husband, our two boys (9 and 12) and I are strongly considering moving from Hawaii to Scottsdale or Tempe. This is a heart-breaking decision as I’ve lived in the islands my whole life. There just comes a point when spending $3,000 in rent for a small townhouse or paying a minimum of $800K for a home is just not realistic, even with us making a very good income. I want to go back to school and am considering ASU. But we’ve obviously never lived in a dessert and I don’t know what to expect. Reviews online say to stay away from living in Tempe unless you want to be surrounded by drunk college kids. And several articles (and their comments) go on and on about how snobby and pretentious people are in Scottsdale. Coming from the Aloha state, I’m a little worried about us not fitting in there. What do you think? Are you loving Scottsdale? I just want my family to be happy.
Hi Nia – We are very happy in Scottsdale. The financial stress and struggle to hold on to our CA life really wore my husband and me down. I actually feel like I am more connected to nature here than I was in San Diego because there are so many hiking trails everywhere and we spend a lot of time outside in our pool, and spending time outdoors is really crucial to my personal happiness. We have a strong support system here, and I think that makes a big difference. My parents, brother and college roommate all live here so it was easy for us to have a robust social life right away. I have found it pretty easy to make friends here as well because so many people are transplants who are also seeking friends. I went to school at ASU and I can attest to the fact that the town is full of drunk college students because I used to be one of them! It’s got a cute walk-able downtown, though, and I’m sure the suburbs away from the school are filled with families. We now live in Scottsdale and I don’t find the people to be pretentious, but then again I moved from Carmel Valley in San Diego, which is quite snooty. I do find, however, that people are less courteous here. My recent “Are You Rude Quiz” post was inspired by the rude behavior I have recently encountered here with strangers. I think it’s worse in summer, when it is very hot and people are crankier (including me!). I think the key is finding people who share similar values and building a community. Also, try to travel during the summer to get out of the heat for a while. The weather really is pretty fantastic for about 8 months of the year. I hope that helps?!
Hi. I am a mom of three young children and a wife of a husband who is considering a move to Arizona. My brother and his children would move with us. My biggest concern is the school system. I love the community and schools that my children currently attend in the suburbs of Chicago. Specifically Park Ridge. Since I have never been to Arizona, and am fnding a wide range of data and opinions on line. Can anyone help me understand if there are well established neighborhoods with great schools from kindergarten through high school?I am seeking schools there are not only great academically, but also offer strong community bonds, including things like Girl/boy Scouts, family events and father/daughter, mother/son dances. Does anyone have any suggestions from personal experience?
Hi Jenny – Arizona ranks 47 out of 51 states (including Washington DC) in terms of education according to the American Legislative Exchange Council. So, no, school are not great here. That being said, we recently passed an education bill to give schools more funding for such things as music classes, gifted programs, physical education classes and the like. My kids’ school in Scottsdale is very good, with caring teachers and staff, well-kept grounds and extra-curricular programs. In Arizona, you have a right to choose whichever school you’d like your children to attend (if there is room, and usually there is), regardless of where you live. So, if you like a particular school and are willing to drive further to reach it, you can enroll your kids there. You will find girl/boy scout troops throughout the Phoenix area. Our public school and many (all?!) others offer before and after care at an affordable rate as well as after school enrichment classes for an additional fee (such as Spanish language, sports of all sorts, acting classes, dance classes, etc.) right on school grounds. Our elementary school does not host a father/daughter or mother/son dance (that I know of), but there was a fall festival fundraiser with all sorts of fun games, food and prizes for families. There will be another festival in the spring and my family attended a family fitness fundraiser with activities focused on staying fit and healthy together. There are fundraisers about once per month at local area restaurants, which are a fun way to raise money for the school and get to know other families. There are also monthly parent talks on school grounds. I love our neighborhood in Scottsdale and find it is easy to make friends here because so many people come from other parts of the country and want to make friends too. I will say that I find the children to be a little bit rougher than they were in San Diego, at least in my son’s 1st grade classroom and in the after school program (teasing each other, pushing each other, etc.). Still, my children have made plenty of friends and we often get invited to classmates’ birthday parties and whatnot. Truly, it really does not seem all that different from the very highly ranked school my kids attended in San Diego. I hope that helps!
Good luck with the move! Wishing you and your family the best in this new chapter in your lives. How lucky you are to be near family and close friends! We were just not meant to meet up in SD 🙂
Thank you, Mary! Maybe we are meant to meet up in Scottsdale instead?! Let me know if you ever come for a visit!
Best of luck, Colleen. It will wonderful to be close to family – for all of you!
Thanks so much, Claudia!
Congratulations, Colleen!
I am SO excited for you! Three years ago, we moved from Seattle to Scottsdale and it was a really positive move for our family. The housing is affordable and there is a ton of stuff to do. I’m so happy to hear you’ll have a backyard pool. We couldn’t survive the summer without our pool! Plus, the excruciatingly hot summers are a perfect excuse to get out of “Dodge” and travel to cooler locales.
Let’s connect when you get settled. I’d love to meet you IRL!
Best wishes for a safe (and stress free) move.
Charmin – I didn’t know you live in Scottsdale! I’d love to connect IRL once we get settled in!
About 5 years ago my family embarked on a journey to live someplace I had no real desire to ever live in my entire life: Orange County, CA. Most of my family had migrated to the area and I had about million preconceived notions about how life would be behind the Orange Curtain. I am so glad that my notions were wrong and we are living in the very place I swore I would never live. Having family in town is such a blessing, especially with young kids. OC was totally what I chose to make of it. And the weather- it can’t be beat. My point is, I hope your journey leads you to joy and experiences you never dreamed you could find in the desert. And hey, you are a travel writer, you can easily ditch that summer heat! Best of luck, friend.
Thank you for the good wishes, Sharlene! Hope to see you soon…Cancun?!
As someone who has moved many times (most recently from CA to NJ), moving is difficult. But you have family there and grew up there, so it will be much easier for you. And I also grew up in Phoenix – ages 0-18, and come to visit a few times a year. Maybe we can get together one of those times!
Debbie – I’d love to get together next time you’re in AZ! Pls give me a holler next time you’ll be in town.
i too am the wife of a man who has some very ocean like job issues and had to move. only we have moved a lot! we started together in illinois only to be thrust into southern indiana for a huge promotion my husband was offered with his company. there we learned to live away from family, far away. we were not there 2 years when 2008 erupted and left him with no job and us with a brand new house in a brand new neighborhood that had lost all of it’s value. while he searched for jobs i manned the life boat and readied our home for sale at a huge loss and through the only means we could, a short sale (2 years after we started trying to sell our home). he had some nibbles here and there and we finally caught a break and took a job in north carolina after a short stint living in my in laws basement. in north carolina the job was meeger, but it existed. we lived in an apartment complex full of nc state kids and did what we could everyday to remain happy together. we lived there for almost 2 years when he received notice they were no longer in need of his services. he felt like a failure and once again i was determined to make things right as best i could and to help him while being his #1 fan and cheerleader. he started his job search and found a great job in tempe az – over 2,000 miles away! he jumped at the opportunity and i jumped in right along with him even though i had never been to az much less seen anything beyond a road runner cartoon or postcard of the grand canyon. we made the trek in april of 2011 in our 2 cars with only a 5×7 trailer of belongings and began a new adventure that for most would be horrific. it has been the best thing to ever happen to us. we have been in the desert now since we arrived and love it. although we may not retire here or live here the rest of our lives, the desert has reminded us that just like the desert – life brings you heat and somes disparity but just like a desert cactus, something amazing can bloom from the experience. good luck on your move, savor the time you have with your family and daydream of ocean filled weekends just like the rest of us desert dwellers. welcome back to az!!
Oh wow, Jen! You certainly have been through a lot of ups & downs & moves! Thank you for sharing your story & for the warm welcome back to the desert!
Hurray for a new adventure! I couldn’t love in the heat but good thing school and fall will be starting up soon. And those glorious winters. Congrats!
Amber – yes, Arizona would be a tough place for a winter & snow lover like you! Thanks for the good wishes!
Best of luck. I think Arizona looks awesome!
Thanks, Corinne! You’ll have to come for a visit sometime! 🙂
Good luck with your move, it’s no fun, but you will settle in soon enough. I am also antsy to leave San Diego. I like it and all, what’s not to like I guess? But I get bored being in one place for too long. I have been back for 10 years almost (and was born and raised here – left when I was 18.) This drives my husband nuts. He likes staying put. He didn’t grow up here, he loves it, he surfs, and his job is stable here. I am envious of your new adventure! I can’t wait to read more posts about it. 🙂
Amanda – Convince your hubby to move to Scottsdale & give me a holler when you arrive! 🙂
Good luck with the move! I know the feeling of the back and forth. We went through a lot of that when our move to Denver came up. Even now, 18 months later, I look back and wonder how on Earth it all got done but it does!
Jen – I know you know all the turmoil we’re going through. It looks like you have really fallen in love with Denver (except for those cloudy days!). I hope I have a similar experience in Arizona!
Off we go to desert and sand and family
We too have inside ring a “big” move for some time now. Arizona is one of our top choices. So far his job in So Cal is just too good to leave and we remain on the fence about the issue. It recurs every few months and we stress and argue over it. I do a lot of stomping and “I can’t live..” With both boys in school, we will have to make this decision one day (probably soon) and hopefully we make the right one. Best of luck with your move!
Hi Christina – Thank you for your kind wishes and best wishes to YOU in finding the right path for your family!
I too have family and friends in Arizona who have made wonderful homes and raised happy families there. And, you can’t underestimate the blessings of living near loving grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins. Best wishes to you and your family! I look forward to reading more Arizona content on Travel Mamas.
Thank you, Allison. I appreciate your kind words of encouragement.
Best of luck with the move, Colleen – it will all work out!!
Thank you, Lisa!
Hello I was wondering how it turned out for you. How you do you deal with the heat? Were getting ready to move there with 5 kids! All under 5! Well be away from family but feel this is the best choice for us at the moment.
Hi Cynthia – We are still living in Arizona and loving it! I make a point to travel for a month every summer when it Phoenix is at its hottest. I am not sure how much time you can escape each year, but I highly recommend saving all of your vacation days for June, July or August and staying in AZ the rest of the year when the weather is fabulous. Also, make sure your property either has a private or a community pool! Best wishes on your family move!